Its been a long time since my last blog post
Alot has changed mentally
Alot has changed geographically
Smooth Sailing has evolved
Once it was a hobby and outlet
Now it is my purpose
There’s been a large transition from this just being a passion of mine to now believing that this will actually lead somewhere
The voice of “reason” has been hammering me for years… “dude, gotta play it safe. finish your degree asap, get to grad school/therapist school, get that stable money coming in and put it away/invest.”
I now know, and not just think, but truly believe and know, I will not be 100% fulfilled if I dont keep on with this.
If I stop now at this point, and never make another track, I will always look back on my life and wonder what would have happened if I had made Smooth Sailing my burning desire and stuck with it.
We die. All of us. Given that we die and that this life doesn’t last forever, why wouldn’t we pursue our passion until that day. I have to.
I face rejection everyday. I faced it alot of my teenage years. I’ve crumbled and choked on stage, and delivered embarrasingly bad vocals and been laughed at. I know that time put in will only improve my skill set, and that I truly have something to offer musically.
It was so interesting reading the trent reznor article here http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/28/arts/music/nine-inch-nails-is-back-onstage-with-a-vengeance.html?smid=fb-share&_r=0 and specifically this section
“My incentive originally for making music was just a way to cathartically get this out,” Mr. Reznor said. “Then I discovered, in the process of doing it, that some ugliness led to some element of beauty. And the process made me feel better. And then when I saw people responded to it and could relate to it — I’m projecting here, but they may have felt less alone.”
Catharsis has nearly always been the prime motivator but also the idea of providing that place of relating. For me, NIN was exactly that, a place that I connected to in the darkest and most fucked up part of my teens. I thought I was alone in what I was experiencing. I didnt know any better. NIN talked about what I was experiencing.
There is no denying the influence that Reznor has had on my life and my music. I dont seek to follow in Trent’s footsteps, I seek that same place that he and endless artists before me have sought. That infinite. That source. The quality. The sounds that we somehow just know intuitively know are right and fit together. The lyrics that we somehow just know are reflective of the abstract and fleeting mental experience of moments past and present.
This is the foundation and manifesto.
Smooth Sailing is resilience manifest.
Smooth Sailing will not stop.